Monday, April 27, 2009 ♥
such an exciting event man! ytd was the star awards, though i was outside celebrating my grandma's bufdae, we manage to catch a few glimpes of some of the winners. s expected, most of the little nyonya cast walk away with prizes. first time in history, there r 2 prizes 4 best supporting actress, ng hui n xiang yun. best actress go to my fav princess, joanne peh. she was shocked, me 2 s i thot that jeanette aw is the most possible person of getting best actress. but maybe her acting in that show is nt that popular s compared to joanne's role of being sexually abuse by her husband in little nyonya. i dun lk jeanette s i find her very fake, she dun show her emotions in acting s compared to joanne. joanne put more feelings in that show, she finally gt best actress after being kicked out of top 10 last 2 years.
i want to watch the repeat telecast s i din catch some of the awards. seriously, there r quite a no of surprises ytd s those i din expect to win, win, while those expected to win, did nt win. wat's funny is that some actress lost their image completely on satge while receiving their prize n some of the costumes ytd sux, lk felicia chin n qi yi wu. even christopher look damn old n ugly ytd la, walau. but the 2 pregnant ladies, ivy n vivian gt top 10, so maybe is the luck of a pregnant woman. this yr, only 2 princess din get prize, compared with last yr 4.
yay man, i oso gt my first taste of vodka ytd. my face did nt turn red n i was nt drunk though the glass is half-filled with vodka, folo by sprite. it was nt very strong s i thot, maybe is cause the vodka is peach-flavored. is damn nice, hope i will nt be addicted to it.
i noe 2dae my post is sort of lk rdm n lame, but i get excited abt this stuff s i m a tv freak myself. so ya loh, pardon me. u can choose nt to read. haha...
listened to the sweet sound @ 5:13 PM
Sunday, April 26, 2009 ♥
it is officially the end of first wk of sch, cun believe time pass so fast, n is even more amazing that i can tahan until now. still can get used to life s a forward student, though i m in 4 separate classes at once, but quite fun. all the stress haven come yet, but by wk 3, it is time to gear up n prepare to chiong le.
lazy to blog more alr, hands tired, gg to upload pics on facebook le. or shd i do it another day, aiyah, another day la.
ok, gtg le. Ciao!
listened to the sweet sound @ 12:55 PM
Monday, April 20, 2009 ♥
hmmm, 2dae first day of sch. wat can i say? nt exactly that excited or nervous s alr 3 yrs in poly le. juz regular sch hrs loh. only thing i can say abt first day is fun, i din expect 3A03 to be so friendly, though i dun noe any of them, but they treat me very gd, tok to me immed. s 2dae is 1 of their classmates bufdae, they even ask me to join them so i wun feel left out. gd right? they very on la, i lk their class spirit. first day pass very quickly but boring, s only briefing, that means lesson only end in abt 15mins, then have to wait damn long 4 the nxt lesson.
forward maths, lucky i nt only one forwarding, if nt damn ps n weird. but i only girl la, so bo bian. my timetable so cool, slackest among all. only thurs end at 6, fri off, then other days all end at 1 or 2. but cause i cun take elective if nt mon n tues occupied oso.though everyday start at 8, including tues gems, but ok la, still can tahan. haha...
nxt sem fyp then busy, this sem concentrate on examinable moduels first, pass my maths so that can do fyp in peace.
play facebook le. Buai!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:10 PM
Sunday, April 19, 2009 ♥
time pass so fast, i haven even enjoy my holidaes when it is time to go back to sch. tmr is the day where i face new sem, new classmates, new challenges n set new resolution.
after my lesson of nt studying 4 maths n gt to forward nxt sem, resulting in me graduating 1 sem later than the rest n gt to start fyp in sep, i vow to study real hard this sem, pull my grades up. till now, haven told my mom abt my forward thing, cause i bet she will really kill me when i gt to take 1 extra sem, gt to think up of some gd excuse to tell her nxt time. though i gt to forward n have been feeling depressed over the past few wks, i m ok now, i told myself i gt to face up to reality n be brave to face up to it. juz concentrate on ur studies n u will find the sem pass very soon. though i hate taking maths again, but is my fault s i din study hard enuf that time. study hard 4 it this time n pass it, b4 u can continue to nxt stage.
wat have i been doing this past wk? gg out with different frenz or staying at home to watch tv. that's abt it. ytd went 4 npcc gathering by my batch. fun sia, long time din c them, all change le. pity, nt all could come, if nt i think more fun. planning to have another gathering in june, maybe at bintan. wonder how long i have to wait? haha...
ok, get ready things 4 tmr le. Cya!
listened to the sweet sound @ 11:07 AM
Wednesday, April 15, 2009 ♥
hi guys, i m back. sry to make all of u worried abt me, but i m feeling much better now. gt to face reality, no matter wat. things may come to u the hard way or everything may nt go smoothly 4 u, but if u r determined n go on, u may be the one who gt the most advantage. i understand this meaning after this wk of cold war.
i want to thank my frenz, all those who stand by me n support me, encourage me nt to give up. w/o them, i think i really will lose motivation to carry on in life, i will nt end my young life, but maybe i will be lk a living zombie from now on. juz gg to sch, half dead, n nt knowing wat is gg on.
though i will be embarrased to face them from now on, i m gg to show them that i will nt give up, i really promise to study hard from now on, graduate from poly in pride. show them that i gt wat it takes. do nt let them look down on me, esp those who bully me in class b4. juz u wait! let's c who has the last laugh.
thanks again. off to do my own things le. Cya!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:13 PM
Thursday, April 9, 2009 ♥
y is god treating me this way? y is heaven so unfair to me? y, oh y? these thought had been in my mind 4 the whole day. y does everything nt turn out according to wat i desired or plan? i had alr suffered 2 setbacks 4 the past 1 wk, n now it had to let me encounter another one, which makes it a total of 3 setbacks in juz 1 mth.
cannot keep up with my pretense any more, i m suffering a lot inside. cannot take it any longer. only putting on a brave front in front of my frenz n parents, but when alone, will feel so depressed n cry.
nearly cried but fought back my tears this morning when i was told i could nt pass cptc. last night din receive call, so went ji happily, din expect that i would be called out by my trainer telling me that i had failed. fuck! y dun he called me or try his best to call me last night, so that dun need to bring my hopes up high n let it fall very badly the nxt day. y so cruel?
juz because of some stupid criteria that cptc set n we r the first batch to tio it. resulting me failing the whole cptc juz because my theory part is bad. last time was total add up above 50% then can pass le, but now is each component must pass to pass the whole thing. n, y dun cptc have different certs, lk distinction, merit, pass n participation, so that everyone have a chance to be on stage, w.o feeling ps that ur frenz noe u fail juz because u were nt on stage. at least if each person gt cert, u can choose to nt let ur frenz noe ur grades. now best, everyone sure noe i fail cause i nt on stage juz now, n may start asking me y i fail when i go back sch?
i feel that i really cannot take all these anymore. trying to shrug it off, but the more i ignore, the more the thing starts coming back to haunt me. feeling very tired alr, i juz want to slp n slp this whole thing off, w/o waking up again. i want to escape from this cruel society, where only elites can survive. if u dun c me online tmr, u noe sth is wrong. u can try to call me, but i may nt ans. i am in a state of ignorant these few days, so pardon me if i blow up top or din ans ur calls these few days. if u din c me online 4 the nxt few days, then sth must be really very very wrong. who noes? maybe i m gone from this world or maybe i m still holding on to wat's left of the flickering light ahead of me, my only source of warmth n hope. juz pray that u will be able to c me again, if nt i will come back to haunt all those who bully me in the past, esp my class.
will upload the last most recent pictures of me on facebook n friendster b4 u will nt get to c me post my pics again.
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:14 PM
Wednesday, April 8, 2009 ♥
tick tock,tick tock, waiting waiting, thump...thump... i m waiting nervously 4 any call to come in, my heart is beating very fast at this moment. no, is nt a crush who will be calling me, but is my fate who will come knocking on my doorstep if have a chance. i m waiting whether i will be receiving any call from cptc telling me that i do not need to go tmr, which means i have yet to pass cptc n will be back nxt year. i do nt want this to happen at all. waited so long juz 4 it to end, n now tell me i had to go again n ungergo all these. i cun bear to think abt it.it is alr 9pm n we were told that by then if we did nt receive any call, that means we r safe, but i cun help worrying. cause i juz change my no n forgot to inform my trainer abt my new no, n if they want to call me at my old no, they sure cun get thru. then they will try all means to contact me, which will result in more time taken. i noe by hook or by crook, they will try to get in touch with those ppl who fail, n i hope i m nt 1 of the " lucky " ones. only tmr when i go there n ask my trainer abt it, then i will feel safe. trying to think positively now. god, nvr had i felt so nervous b4, apart from getting exam results, of course. i do not want to suffer another setback. i pray...
listened to the sweet sound @ 9:06 PM
Tuesday, April 7, 2009 ♥
hurray! 2dae offically marks the end of cptc. n i really mean officially end, s all the tests n everything is completed. we only need go back on thurs 4 the graduation ceremony, that is provided u pass this course, of course. i m damn scared la, mine theory nt so gd, n 2dae final term exam not so confident on whether it can help me pass overall or nt. hope wun kena get called tmr if nt sure die. i dun want come back hell nxt year.
4 the nxt few days, gg to spend my time slacking at home, watching finish my movie etc. gonna spend the last wk of holidaes in peace.
shhhh... go play games le. gg work tmr. ever since my dad lose his job, my mom is the sole breadwinner of the family, she oso nt earning much so i s a daughter, must play a part so that they can cut down on the monthly allowances given to me.
continue tmr, hope is nt a boring day. Buai!
listened to the sweet sound @ 8:18 PM
Sunday, April 5, 2009 ♥
yay man! finally bought a new phone after 6 mths of waiting. change plan n no oso. those who do nt have my new no either take from me personally or u can c it in my msn. plus 2dae the phone that i aiming at long time is having offer 4 the last day 2dae. from $400 plus to juz $98. okok, shadn't keep u in the suspense any longer, my new phone is W595, pink in colour. c that, pink colour, another new collection to my collection of pink. nxt will be maybe a laptop n nds. slowly buy.
sian, i cfm forward. 2dae c my registered modules, study 2 less modules than my counterparts, excluding the elective. timetable oso weird weird one, a lot different from them. i everyday go different class, then more weird is some i study with stage a ppl though i m in stage b. damn confused by it la, dun noe how they set one. aiyah, tues go sch, try to find lecturer, try to appeal to take maths s extra module so that no need to miss out on 2 modules. shd be still have time ba. if nt cun graduate in peace or maybe nt tgt with my classmates.
argh! headache. i seriously hate my maths lecturer. f*ck!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:27 PM
Friday, April 3, 2009 ♥
fire fighting is damn fun la. how to hold the hose n nozzle, the diff command n the responsibilities of each person. esp when the water is on, we have to support the person in front due to the back pressure of the nozzle. the water pressure is at 16 bar la, strong siah.
was chose to be the leader during the first scenario, at first i thot shout n lead only, but then my trainer say:" later u go isolate valve hor" which means i have to get wet s i gt to close the valve in the full jet of water, lk in a real life fire. then everybody is lk saying:" thanks hor, pei yun, sacrifice 4 us first." so i was the first to kena the water n my clothes was all wet. but of course, the others gt wet 2, then all rushing to go toilet bathe. i was the last so gt more time to bathe s can slowly. haha... overall, quite fun la. though nt that sure in leading, but is experience 4 us n can c the co-operation of a grp, esp with a grp lk mine. so enthu n helpful to each other.
final term coming soon, gt to study real hard s i gt to take at least 60 n above to pass my theory session. i dun want retake cptc, so gt to jiayou. back to work tmr. Buai!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:39 PM
Wednesday, April 1, 2009 ♥
2dae is back to normal time, dun noe y so slpy 2dae, may nt be used to waking up so early after the 2 days night shift, or maybe i slept too much when i return home on tues morning. was too lazy to do my logbook ytd, so spent the 1 hr on train this morning to write my logbook, from the beginning onwards. i m nt kidding, i finish my whole entry, starting from the beginning in juz 1 hr, on the train summore. i was surprised oso, hehe... may be due to i gt the basic idea in my mind alr, so noe wat to write.
final term coming, gt to study really hard 4 this one so that i can pass my theory, after failing my mid term. wish me luck. shift work plays a very impt part in the final term, hope i can rmb everything that is being taught during that 3 days. Gambatte!
shall end here. indulge in my own world le, the world of music. Ciao!
listened to the sweet sound @ 8:09 PM
