Tuesday, May 5, 2009 ♥
wow, broke my own record, din blog 4 8 days, which is more than 1 wk, the longest absenteesm after that depressing incident.
wateva, oso nth much to tok abt. nt willing or shd i say lazy to blog my thoughts out everyday on my regular frenz alr, is lk my blog is alr a stranger to me. things change very quickly, from 1 moment, can become my "soulmate", the other moment can become strangers to each other.
so now, i m feeling lonely n crave for the accompany of my "soulmate" once again, so here i m.
sch has been fun this few days, though there r many assignments to complete by the wk b4 mst, but i considered lucky, all my other frenz busy with fyp n long days at sch, but i finish early n with the absence of fyp, i can concentrate more on the things at hand.
so fast, third wk of sch le. gems is fun, in fact, this is the most fun gems i have ever taken, kudos to meiqi 4 recommending me to join this gems tgt with her. first lesson of french last wk, oso fun, get to noe abt 5 fren in juz 2 hrs itself. french is hard to say n learn but sounds cool when u noe how to speak it. thanks 4 my momma 4 encouraging me to take it.
sch tmr, pd, the most boring module, n u noe wat is worse, it is nt only a whole year module, but the assignment is whole yr 2. is lk fyp, lucky i dun have fyp this time, but if i have, that means i gt to focus on 2 whole year projs. tiring....
nth much to blog abt le, this is juz my life. i m an extrovert. i prefer toking than typing it out. no wonder the quiz 2dae really tell me how extrovert i m, n it is true. i cannot stand being w/o frenz n nth to do. i must have activities piled up n i love to plan 4 large gatherings. u ask all those who noe me very well, who is always the one who plan n organise gatherings? is me... lol
ok, gtg. fighting spiders is starting soon. watching that. Cya!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:39 PM
Monday, April 27, 2009 ♥
such an exciting event man! ytd was the star awards, though i was outside celebrating my grandma's bufdae, we manage to catch a few glimpes of some of the winners. s expected, most of the little nyonya cast walk away with prizes. first time in history, there r 2 prizes 4 best supporting actress, ng hui n xiang yun. best actress go to my fav princess, joanne peh. she was shocked, me 2 s i thot that jeanette aw is the most possible person of getting best actress. but maybe her acting in that show is nt that popular s compared to joanne's role of being sexually abuse by her husband in little nyonya. i dun lk jeanette s i find her very fake, she dun show her emotions in acting s compared to joanne. joanne put more feelings in that show, she finally gt best actress after being kicked out of top 10 last 2 years.
i want to watch the repeat telecast s i din catch some of the awards. seriously, there r quite a no of surprises ytd s those i din expect to win, win, while those expected to win, did nt win. wat's funny is that some actress lost their image completely on satge while receiving their prize n some of the costumes ytd sux, lk felicia chin n qi yi wu. even christopher look damn old n ugly ytd la, walau. but the 2 pregnant ladies, ivy n vivian gt top 10, so maybe is the luck of a pregnant woman. this yr, only 2 princess din get prize, compared with last yr 4.
yay man, i oso gt my first taste of vodka ytd. my face did nt turn red n i was nt drunk though the glass is half-filled with vodka, folo by sprite. it was nt very strong s i thot, maybe is cause the vodka is peach-flavored. is damn nice, hope i will nt be addicted to it.
i noe 2dae my post is sort of lk rdm n lame, but i get excited abt this stuff s i m a tv freak myself. so ya loh, pardon me. u can choose nt to read. haha...
listened to the sweet sound @ 5:13 PM
Sunday, April 26, 2009 ♥
it is officially the end of first wk of sch, cun believe time pass so fast, n is even more amazing that i can tahan until now. still can get used to life s a forward student, though i m in 4 separate classes at once, but quite fun. all the stress haven come yet, but by wk 3, it is time to gear up n prepare to chiong le.
lazy to blog more alr, hands tired, gg to upload pics on facebook le. or shd i do it another day, aiyah, another day la.
ok, gtg le. Ciao!
listened to the sweet sound @ 12:55 PM
Monday, April 20, 2009 ♥
hmmm, 2dae first day of sch. wat can i say? nt exactly that excited or nervous s alr 3 yrs in poly le. juz regular sch hrs loh. only thing i can say abt first day is fun, i din expect 3A03 to be so friendly, though i dun noe any of them, but they treat me very gd, tok to me immed. s 2dae is 1 of their classmates bufdae, they even ask me to join them so i wun feel left out. gd right? they very on la, i lk their class spirit. first day pass very quickly but boring, s only briefing, that means lesson only end in abt 15mins, then have to wait damn long 4 the nxt lesson.
forward maths, lucky i nt only one forwarding, if nt damn ps n weird. but i only girl la, so bo bian. my timetable so cool, slackest among all. only thurs end at 6, fri off, then other days all end at 1 or 2. but cause i cun take elective if nt mon n tues occupied oso.though everyday start at 8, including tues gems, but ok la, still can tahan. haha...
nxt sem fyp then busy, this sem concentrate on examinable moduels first, pass my maths so that can do fyp in peace.
play facebook le. Buai!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:10 PM
Sunday, April 19, 2009 ♥
time pass so fast, i haven even enjoy my holidaes when it is time to go back to sch. tmr is the day where i face new sem, new classmates, new challenges n set new resolution.
after my lesson of nt studying 4 maths n gt to forward nxt sem, resulting in me graduating 1 sem later than the rest n gt to start fyp in sep, i vow to study real hard this sem, pull my grades up. till now, haven told my mom abt my forward thing, cause i bet she will really kill me when i gt to take 1 extra sem, gt to think up of some gd excuse to tell her nxt time. though i gt to forward n have been feeling depressed over the past few wks, i m ok now, i told myself i gt to face up to reality n be brave to face up to it. juz concentrate on ur studies n u will find the sem pass very soon. though i hate taking maths again, but is my fault s i din study hard enuf that time. study hard 4 it this time n pass it, b4 u can continue to nxt stage.
wat have i been doing this past wk? gg out with different frenz or staying at home to watch tv. that's abt it. ytd went 4 npcc gathering by my batch. fun sia, long time din c them, all change le. pity, nt all could come, if nt i think more fun. planning to have another gathering in june, maybe at bintan. wonder how long i have to wait? haha...
ok, get ready things 4 tmr le. Cya!
listened to the sweet sound @ 11:07 AM
Wednesday, April 15, 2009 ♥
hi guys, i m back. sry to make all of u worried abt me, but i m feeling much better now. gt to face reality, no matter wat. things may come to u the hard way or everything may nt go smoothly 4 u, but if u r determined n go on, u may be the one who gt the most advantage. i understand this meaning after this wk of cold war.
i want to thank my frenz, all those who stand by me n support me, encourage me nt to give up. w/o them, i think i really will lose motivation to carry on in life, i will nt end my young life, but maybe i will be lk a living zombie from now on. juz gg to sch, half dead, n nt knowing wat is gg on.
though i will be embarrased to face them from now on, i m gg to show them that i will nt give up, i really promise to study hard from now on, graduate from poly in pride. show them that i gt wat it takes. do nt let them look down on me, esp those who bully me in class b4. juz u wait! let's c who has the last laugh.
thanks again. off to do my own things le. Cya!
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:13 PM
Thursday, April 9, 2009 ♥
y is god treating me this way? y is heaven so unfair to me? y, oh y? these thought had been in my mind 4 the whole day. y does everything nt turn out according to wat i desired or plan? i had alr suffered 2 setbacks 4 the past 1 wk, n now it had to let me encounter another one, which makes it a total of 3 setbacks in juz 1 mth.
cannot keep up with my pretense any more, i m suffering a lot inside. cannot take it any longer. only putting on a brave front in front of my frenz n parents, but when alone, will feel so depressed n cry.
nearly cried but fought back my tears this morning when i was told i could nt pass cptc. last night din receive call, so went ji happily, din expect that i would be called out by my trainer telling me that i had failed. fuck! y dun he called me or try his best to call me last night, so that dun need to bring my hopes up high n let it fall very badly the nxt day. y so cruel?
juz because of some stupid criteria that cptc set n we r the first batch to tio it. resulting me failing the whole cptc juz because my theory part is bad. last time was total add up above 50% then can pass le, but now is each component must pass to pass the whole thing. n, y dun cptc have different certs, lk distinction, merit, pass n participation, so that everyone have a chance to be on stage, w.o feeling ps that ur frenz noe u fail juz because u were nt on stage. at least if each person gt cert, u can choose to nt let ur frenz noe ur grades. now best, everyone sure noe i fail cause i nt on stage juz now, n may start asking me y i fail when i go back sch?
i feel that i really cannot take all these anymore. trying to shrug it off, but the more i ignore, the more the thing starts coming back to haunt me. feeling very tired alr, i juz want to slp n slp this whole thing off, w/o waking up again. i want to escape from this cruel society, where only elites can survive. if u dun c me online tmr, u noe sth is wrong. u can try to call me, but i may nt ans. i am in a state of ignorant these few days, so pardon me if i blow up top or din ans ur calls these few days. if u din c me online 4 the nxt few days, then sth must be really very very wrong. who noes? maybe i m gone from this world or maybe i m still holding on to wat's left of the flickering light ahead of me, my only source of warmth n hope. juz pray that u will be able to c me again, if nt i will come back to haunt all those who bully me in the past, esp my class.
will upload the last most recent pictures of me on facebook n friendster b4 u will nt get to c me post my pics again.
listened to the sweet sound @ 7:14 PM
